Tomorrow... HELLO TREADMILL!!!

I have come to realize that sometimes... ONLY sometimes... there are things more important than staying 100% on program.  One of my very best friends is in town and we have been getting as much quality time as possible while she is here... And you know us southerners, when you are with family there is food... and by food I mean DELICIOUS food.  The last few days have been wonderful, I have missed Lyndi so much and I love her family... its one of those families that I feel like I am family as much as anyone else. 

I am headed over to have lunch with them in a bit and was honestly thinking of cancelling... Not because I don't want to go but because I know there will be fabulous items that are almost impossible for me to say no to... I really struggled for awhile about whether or not I should attend and then I almost felt ridiculous for even considering not spending time with these fabulous people. 

I began this journey because I didn't want food to control my life any longer but if I don't enjoy life for fear of what might be served am I any better off than I was before I began? I want every relationship in my life to be healthy... that includes food... and fear is not a part of healthy.

The fact is, its all about choices... today I choose to enjoy every second that I can with my dear friend.  I will not go overboard but one of the best part of family get togethers is the love that we share... and one way share it is through food.  I'm not giving myself a "free" day that I can eat whatever and however much I want, but I will indulge a bit because today there are more important things than the number on the scale.  Tomorrow... HELLO TREADMILL!!!!

Beginning to see it

I was having dinner with my friend Amanda, Sunday and I was telling her that I was wearing the same size as one of our friends and that I couldn't believe it because I think I look sooooo much larger then she does.  Amanda looked at me for a moment and replied... "I don't think you look soooo much bigger, I think you just don't see yourself in your new body yet... it will probably take awhile."

Well, I got new pics made yesterday and I decided to compare them with my album pics... I think I'm starting to see the difference.  I posted them below... I didn't want to say before and after because if you can't tell then I have ALOT more work to do lol.

The Last Leg

Today is my official RESTART DAY.  The last few months have been a bit of a transition period for me and although I haven't gone crazy with my eating, I have not been on program even 90%... This isn't something I'm proud of or anything I want to admit, but if I tell you the good stuff, I gotta tell you the bad, right?
What I am realizing about myself is that when my schedule gets off, or when my life is transitioning into a new chapter it is hard to hold on to my eating program.  It is not the eating that is difficult, it is the caring.  Eating well really isn't difficult once it becomes your lifestyle... but maybe its the change of my lifestyle that makes the eating difficult... hmmm, that kind of makes sense to me.  Why wouldn't my "diet" get off when I'm trying to make this transition?

Ok, so today I am getting into my new schedule and with that new schedule I am restarting my program.  I WILL hit my goal of losing 140-150 lbs!!! When I started this journey that number didn't exist... I thought "Maybe I will lose 50"  funny how things change :-) Now, I am finally to that point where 50 lbs is truly all I need to lose... CRAZY.  I am truly at the last leg of the marathon... got to harness every ounce of energy I have left to make the finish line... HERE WE GO!!!

A Lesson from Chex Mix???

A few weeks ago, in a moment of weakness, I bought chex mix... REALLY??? CHEX MIX???? On a scale to 1-10 on the "I love it" scale, chex mix is about a 4.5... I like it at a party, but I don't know that I have ever bought a bag of chex mix in my life.  So, I drove down the rode, eating my not really worth it snack, thinking "what am I doing???" I then proceeded to hold the bag out the window and let the carb packed pieces fly away. (not to worry, my environmentalist friends, I kept the bag and discarded it properly later)
Now, you have probably figured out by now that this led to my favorite question "WHY?"  It wasn't until I was discussing it with my friend Cindy that I understood.  Cindy is one of those intuitive people that has the amazing ability to give you "aha" moments, which is why I try to visit with her as often as possible.  She said, "Katy, what does Chex Mix look like?" I quickly responded, "A mess!" AHA!!!

Suddenly it all made sense... I had been feeling like my life was all jumbled up.  I was facing some big decisions and dealing with some of life's craziness and was honestly very overwhelmed.  It was as if I couldn't make heads or tails out of anything.  That bag of carbs was a perfect example of how I was feeling... instead of seeing cereal, pretzels, and nuts I saw a hodge podge of emotions and decisions.  It wasn't until the "Aha Moment" that I could separate each piece and deal with one thing out a time.

It kind of gives "eating your feelings" a whole new meaning.  So, I did a little experiment with myself.  I decided I would pay close attention to what I was craving and try to match it with the emotion I was having at that moment... now, I'm no scientist but I was intrigued by my results...

It seems that when I crave creamy foods like ice cream or pudding I tend to be feeling physically tense... needing something soothing.  Crunchy foods such as chips or popcorn are when I feel anxiety... needing to let out my nervous energy.  Anything sweet like chocolate or caramel is often craved when I am sad or lonely... needing a little happiness.

Interesting, don't you think???  With this new found information I have made a new goal... I will continue to pay close attention to how cravings & feelings coincide and then I will develop better, healthier ways to accomplish the intended result.  Pain... hot bath, anxiety... take a walk, sad or lonely... call a friend... you get the point.

Who knew I could learn so much from a little bag of Chex Mix??? :-)